Saturday, August 06, 2005


In the last 2 years I've made a lot of changes in my life, slowly yes, but I have done it:

I moved back to the Jersey Shore, despite a lot of whining and moaning about it from others

I picked a place to live where I don't have to do large amounts of yard and house work (if people think I'm trailer trash, they can go fuck themselves, I'm not killing myself with yard work and house work any more!!! Plus I think my trailer is better the most people's house's .... On the energy savings alone.)

I've tried to stop working all together and retire. (this has worked somewhat, but not all the way. I just have to learn to live on what I have, and stop the shopping! Giggle)

I decided to STOP dieting! After seeing my sister and mother looking like living skeletons.... What's the point! They kept thin, and are losing their health because of it. I honesty believe Mom died because she didn't have the reserves of fat needed to stay healthy. Is it worth it? In my opinion, NO! Not that I'm going to run amok and get fatter, I'm just going to keep exercising and give up dieting. And take the time to enjoy the food I love so much.

I decided that maintaining my hair was a bitch, and went natural. I've worked for years keeping it pretty, but natural can be pretty too. I just needed to adjust to it, and live with it. Not that I'll give up makeup (please! There are limits!!! GIGGLE) but I'm tired of working so hard to keep looking young. I'm not young anymore...Cope!

And just this week I decided to make another change. I'm giving up dating and men. I don't know what happened.... When I was younger men were men. They were strong, and dominate, and knew how to treat a women.
Now they have all turned in to whinny little boys. Boys who want sex, but not the commitment that comes with it. Boy's who have forgotten how to treat a women, and have become the ME, ME, ME generation. They show no ability to have fun, they are too busy impressing other people. They show no ability for romance, why romance someone when all you want is sex? And as for sex, they have forgotten that it can be fun, and kinky and just a pleasure, and worry way too much about how they look and what they are getting out of it. It's just not worth the work!!!!!!
All I asked for was one man to say...."Shut up, your with me, I love you, and your going to have to cope, I'm not giving you up!" LOL
living in a dream world is kinda nice, don't you think so?
They have lost the strenth, and macho attitude, and have turned into major wieners. Yuck

They have lost the ability to attract me. And it's a shame. That's the original reason I turned to dating black men, because they still had the attitude..... But I've noticed lately that it's gone, even men as little as 5 years younger then me are total Wieners!

So I'm done

There are going to me more changes coming. Changes that I've tried over the years to do, but was held back one way or the other. Sometimes from family obligations, or how I was raised, or just because I cared too much what other people thought of me, my house, my appearence and so on

I'm done! No more! No compromises! No trying to impress! I'm me. Love me or fuck off!!

So stay tuned, to this channel, this time, and watch the evolution of this women!!!! Enjoy the show, comment all you want. DAMN I SHOULD HAVE DONE THIS 35 YEARS AGO!!!!!